Thursday, July 19, 2007


I had my pre-op appointment yesterday and I think it went pretty well. I got to ask the questions I needed to ask, we both gained even more confidence in my doctor and her abilities, and were able to leave the appointment actually looking forward to the surgery date and getting to the healing part. She explained the hows and the whys and what to expect all along the way. She was real, and honest, at the same time compassionate to our worries and desire for future fertility.

Can I tell you how oddly "normal" it is becoming to be in such a compromising position? No longer do they need to say "Skoot. Skoot. Just a little further..." and I think Eric is even getting used to seeing me in "that" position and having a doctor's head "down there". He even handled hearing about the details of the procedure, where he would have likely passed out a month ago.

I also talked to her about how uncomfortable I have been and she said there isn't really anything I can do about it. I haven't been able to sleep through the night, my pants don't fit (maternity pants are an option but totally depress me since... I'm not pregnant), I have to pee ALL the time, the constipation, the heartburn, OH the HEARTBURN! I don't know if this is like some of the physical aspects of a pregnancy without the morning sickness, but it kinda sucks. I'm not looking forward to the pain of recovery, but I am totally looking forward to how I'll feel afterwards. The surgery date has moved around a bit, and this final date is about a month away, and I can't wait!

The most difficult thing was actually hearing her say I will never experience labor. Sure hearing the risks of infection, blood transfusions and hysterectomy were there too, but I had already fully known those. Due to the surgery compromising my uterus, if I were to get pregnant and make it to the 3rd trimester, they will schedule a premature c-section. How premature would depend on how everything is going. Multiple doctors had talked to me about having an early c-section because of the fibroids even without the myomectomy, so I KNEW about it, but no one ever said, "You will never go through labor".

So why did hearing it, in those words, finally get through to me?

I'm not really upset, more disappointed and am coming to terms with it the more I think about it. Better to know now then to have it be a surprise and an emergency, eh?
I've described how I feel in a bazaar way:
It's kinda like my desire to go to Las Vegas. I've never been, and even though I don't gamble, I hate the smoke, I don't really want to pay the prices, I still want to go... to experience it.

Plenty of women have c-sections, and after having one they often deliver all future babies the same way. Do they feel like they've missed out on some amazing part of being a woman and a mother?


Karen MEG said...

Sounds like you've got a really good doctor. I had to laugh when you mentioned that these exams all seem so routine. I've been through so much with fertility treaments and childbirth I'd probably have no problems dropping my pants on the street for anyone who looked like a ob/gyn!
I can't comment from the C-section perspective. Labour for me felt initially like really bad menstrual cramping combined with having to have a bowel movement every few minutes. For my 2nd it was more intense as it was back labour - little G was facing the wrong way and had to be turned before my final push. I tried feeling the love for it, visualizing and all that, but for me it was just a means to an end. They don't call it labour for nothing! So I asked for epidurals both times. The important thing for me and I'm sure for you, will be the miraculous bundle of joy you get to hold.
The nice thing about a C-section is that you can organize things around a specific date. I had both a month early which threw things off a bit.
You're exactly where my sister was not too long ago - she would even get asked if she was pregnant (insensitivity of some people; another subject altogether). She's scheduled to have her C-section next Tuesday. We're all so excited.
You should still go to Vegas. I hate gambling too, but aside from that and the smoke, the city itself is just a sight to behold with all the hotels and excess. The shows are pretty spectacular too.
Sorry for the bloggarrhea!

Py Korry said...

From a guy's point of view, labor is one of those things that I don't think you'd want to go though. It was pretty tough to see J in all that pain and try to remain calm and supportive throughout.

J at said...

I've heard that a lot (not all) of women who get c sections do feel that they missed out. Having gone through it, though, I would opt for transporting the baby magically out, with no pushing, and no cutting. Can someone do that, please?

Gina said...

I had to have a C-section due to Mr. P being breech, and it was technically a "scheduled" one.

And I have to say that I don't feel any less a woman or mother because I didn't go through labor. I went through the whole damn nine months of pregnancy, I'm not going to let less than 24 hours of it define myself as a woman!

Besides, what truly matters is that a healthy baby is born, not how it got out.

ML said...

I'm glad things are progressing in a positive manner. I hope you find relief and feel better after the procedure.

I don't have kids so I can't comment on the labor part. However, I feel that as long as both you and the baby are healthy, it doesn't matter how he/she comes into the world.

Ginger said...

Frankly, I can't see anyone thinking they are less because they didn't labor. Huh? I mean those of us who had labor think the scheduled C-sections are the lucky ones. (Have you tried Pepcid AC for the heartburn? It worked well for me when pregnant.) And besides its neither the pregnancy or the labor that makes a woman a mother, it's the love for that precious child.

Beenzzz said...

I wished someone had knocked me out and taken the baby c-section. Labor sucked ass! Excuse my colorful language. I have to write a post about it on Zoe's birthday. That's the main reason I only have one child. They say you forget, but I never forgot!
Ok, enough about that. Sorry you are having such bad heartburn. Your doctor sounds extremely competant. I think you're in awesome hands and will recover quickly. I wish you all the best. :)

J at said...

beenzzz, I didn't forget either. ;)

~Donna~ said...

I had Spencer by of those emergency ones. I had hours and hours of labor and then major i feel any less of a woman or mother? Hell no. Like Ginger's what happens after..the first time you hold that beautiful child...

Anonymous said...

This not going through labor situation sounds like a tempest in a teapot to me. I think that being healthy is what really counts. And however you give birth is just fine for all concerned.

Now onward to your surgery. It sounds like things are becoming clearer to you and that you're getting more comfortable with what all this means. I'm not glad that this happened to you, but I am glad that you'll be getting better very soon.

Chrissy121875 said...

Hi Cherry!
Hope all's well where you are :) Great post, by the way!

I haven't experienced giving birth yet, but last year, 5 out of 6 of my friends who did have babies had C-sections!!! I was so surprised at how high the number of C-sections was! I think whatever works best and is the safest for mom and baby, then that's the option that a person should choose. I know a lot of my friends who have had C-sections have said that they would probably do it again that way. My sister-in-law had her baby naturally and she was such a trooper. She had a really difficult time, but pulled through (she almost needed a blood transfusion since she lost so much blood when her placenta didn't come out).

Glad to hear your pre-op appointment went well :) Thinking of you and hope to hear more updates!