Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Procrastination sucks!

I am a procrastinator. I sign up for reasonable sized challenges and projects (where talking in every aspect of life here, not just work), but I have never been one to start on them early or on-time. All through school, and now into my adult life, I still wait until the last minute to do stuff that has deadlines. And if it doesn't have a deadline, then heaven help me if I ever start.

Every time I say... "Next time I won't do this to myself", but I always do.

Plus I'm a perfectionist, so that doesn't really help matters when you are already a few days past the due date and you want it to be perfect. Lots of sleep is lost. Tempers are raised. And the inevitable breakdown will happen at which point Eric will be the wonderful man that he is and will help me through whatever mess I've gotten myself into this time. Even if it is going out to get me comfort food take-out so I don't have to think about the most daunting thought of the night... what to have for dinner?

When I'm stressed, I get all weird about what I'm going to eat. And often I don't eat because I get even more stressed trying to make food or even decide on what will be yummy. Stress is not the healthiest of diets for me. It's bad enough that I am usually not sleeping much by this point, but when I stop eating, then you know it's bad.

My procrastination isn't just about big projects. It also shows itself when it's time to get ready to leave the house. No matter how much I'm looking forward to who I'm going to see or what I'm going to do, I don't seem to start to get ready until I'm supposed to be leaving or honestly, am supposed to be already there. I know.. sad huh? And very frustrating to my friends. I was even late to my 2 rounds of interviews at my current job, but I still go it so I figure I'm just not learning any lessons here so I just keep doing what I do.

I blame this habit on my birth, not my mother, just my birthing situation. I was almost a month late. I had a twin at conception, but was alone at birth and was breech on my due date, so the doctors figured to let me cook a while longer and turn around naturally since I didn't have all of the resources for the first many months of my development (ok that is TOTALLY weirding me out when I think about being a developing fetus). And out I popped a Virgo and not a Leo, which totally makes sense because I'm SOOOo a Virgo.


Ally Bean said...

A procrastinating perfectionist, eh? At least you know who you are which is more than most people can say! Hang in there.

J said...

OK, that was tiring to read. Now I know why, when you're coming over for lunch at 11:30, I'll get a pop up at 11:30 that says, "I'm leaving now!!!" Ha! Maybe I'll start not letting you in, so you'll learn. ;)


Gina said...

I'm the same way. Except I am a Pisces, and Pisces for the most part are just kind of lazy all around.

beenzzz said...

You do sound like a true virgo!!! I don't handle stress very well either. I can become very overwhelmed and stop sleeping and changing my eating habits as well. I also become very sick once its all over. Great things stress does to the body, huh? Scary stuff. Hang in there!!!

ML said...

Stess is so hard on a person - mentally, physically, emotionally. ACK! I really hope you get de-stressed soon so you can start feeling better.

laluna said...

I would not worry about it, just enjoy life, and laugh at the things that stress you out.