Sleep, where for art thou?

I'd like to start this post by noting that I'm writing it from my phone because LilMiss decided to fall back to sleep after a very cute and giggly "good morning" and she's in my bed, and Eric went to run an errand so I can't leave the room now because what if she decides she is going to roll over right now? Sigh

To start, when I was pregnant, Eric decided we should co-sleep, what? Most the world's cultures do it! This wasn't my plan as it wasn't what I was familiar with, plus I knew I'd be the one going back to work so I was all about the crib...In her own room... ASAP.

Then we agreed to using a co-sleeper bassinet or a pack'n'play in our room for an unagreed to length of time. I just asked that we revisit the topic occasionally as time passes.
This is all while she's still cooking.

We get home from the hospital after a very brief stay there considering I had a C-Section and she's sleeping in the co-sleeper just fine. She's tiny(5lbs), and sleepy so we are waking her to feed her around the clock.

Fast forward to a few weeks later and suddenly she won't sleep unless she's being held. I blamed the MIL visiting and holding her ALL DAY, but then decided it's just a phase. I started laying down and nursing her to sleep and we'd move her once she was deeply asleep, but this would only work for the first 4 hours. After that she seemed to want to nurse every hour so I started keeping her with me in bed. And now...against what I had planned...we are co-sleeping in our bed all the time.
And naps? In arms. Can't be put down.
I kind of love it though but it's getting to be exhausting.

We're at 3 months today, and a month ago her Dr said we might want to consider some sleep training by 4 months and I didn't even tell him about how she won't sleep out of arms at all, just that we don't put her down until she's totally asleep. He's a fan of putting them down drousy.

We were just doing what worked so we could all get some sleep. She just sleeps so soundly and hard when she's with me versus moving and kicking and waking herself up when she's alone. Plus, now I find I miss her and our time if she does successfully sleep in the bassinet.

So what to do?

We haven't been consistant with bedtime routines because she is generally so sleepy she fights us and going to sleep unless I lay down so no point in saying we are going to do a bath and story if she's just tired and crying for the boob. She doesn't seem to go to sleep soundly until about 10pm and doesn't really wake up until 10am, but he'll she takes her longest nap late in the afternoon so is she really ready for bed then?
So I guess we need to start everything earlier?
That means when I go back to work, by the time I get home she will be already starting her bedtime routine? THAT F-ing blows!!

I've been reading some methods and have asked Eric to read some too because he needs to be all in on this and not me just telling him how it's going down because that never works out well for anyone.

Why can't she just tell me what to do?
What did you all do with your kids?

Ahh. Some giggle smiley baby is staring up at me. I must go chew on her now.


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Post about Posts

I have so many posts floating around in my head but so little time to type them out so here are a few topics I wish to touch on in upcoming posts (you'll note a new theme to my posts by the way...):

Breastfeeding and my obsession with milk production - Moo
Cloth Diapering - why am I doing this again?
Baby Journals - Did you do one?
Milk Production - pumping all the time, pumping all the time (sung to My Girl likes to Party all the time)
Precious time - Me or the Baby
Boobies - No baby, look at Mommy's eyes!
Milk Storage
Co-Sleeping
Which came first the cookies or the milk? Cookies for Milk Production
What do you really call them? - Nicknames
Boobies
Milk Stash
Why won't you sleep baby?
Making baby food
Missing Home
Going back to work
Daddy Daycare
#2?
Carpal Tunnel doesn't go away
Left handed Bejeweled, Right boobed feeding
Boobies - how often can we say 'Boobies' in this house in a day?
Thinking of buying a freezer to put in the garage for milk
BOOBIES!

Did I mention I'm obsessed with Milk Production?
I used to be obsessed with my eye brows.

Alone Time

Hi!
It's almost 1am and I'm awake and alone and I think I like it for the moment.

LilMiss is sleeping..sorta.. I think... I keep hearing little noises on the receiver who's transceiver is pointed at the co-sleeper thingy next to my bed while I'm on the other side of the house AT A COMPUTER (which has only happened a handful of times in the last 2.75 months, 90% of those times during this week). The monitor system doesn't work well in this house which must have lead in the walls or something because our wireless network also have VERY limited range, so the receiver is only about 30 feet from its mate and it still has interference, but I turn up the volume so I can still hear whats going on in there since I closed the door. Thankfully the house is small.

Eric is sleeping in the baby's room which is kinda funny if you think about it as she's in our room. There is a twin bed in there and he has to work in the field tomorrow so I told him to just sleep the whole night in there, but that he should expect to sleep less this weekend. :-) Usually if he has to work in the field, he sleeps the first half of the night (2-4 hours) in our room and then helps with her first feeding (changing her diaper while I pee, gets me water or anything I need, then hopefully puts her back to bed), and then if she doesn't appear to be going back to sleep right away then he'll move over to her room to get a few more solid hours. He's the pro at putting her back in the co-sleeper as she just won't do it for me 75% of the time, so I may regret my generosity.

Then why am I here you ask?
Yes I am tired, and yes this keyboard is causing twinges in my elbows and wrists, but I miss you guys! So I went through my reader and admiringly skimmed through your blogs and I might sorta be caught up a little. I even commented here and there but not many so I apologize if you didn't feel the love. I've rediscovered the feed reader on my iPhone, so I may remember I can read blogs while feeding her and stuff, but commenting may be more difficult. And here I was limiting myself to staring and refreshing Facebook and Twitter over and over again in an effort to remain connected to the outside world. Silly me.

I shall go fold a load of laundry now and then turn in. Wish me luck in not waking her up! Maybe tonight will be another 7 hourer. too bad I've already blown almost 4 hours. (inside voice - HOLY CRAP! I'M DUMB! Screw the laundry)

STOP IT!

Today the straps on the car seat were moved up a notch. Sigh.


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Swapping

I have two piles of baby clothes on a shelf in Lil'Miss' closet getting ready to be packed up for storage.

One is full of gifted or hand me downs which I have come to the conclusion that she will never wear as they are not at all her shape. She is a long slim baby, 37% for height and 1% for weight, and apparently a lot of clothes are made for short round babies. I finally pulled these clothes out of her dresser as I got tired of digging around them. She pretty much wears Carter's clothing everday as they seem to fit her perfectly, although her jammies are getting too short in the arms and legs but still loose in the middle.

Then, this week I have begun a pile of clothes that are already too small for my Lil'Miss. I had pulled out the preemie clothes that were way tiny a while ago, but now even the larger of the wee clothes don't fit lengthwise. Then yesterday I started swapping out some newborn clothes for 0-3 month clothes. Only one brand so far (Gerber). I do hope she'll get to wear all of the cute 0-3mo summer outfits but it's looking unlikely.

Part of me hurts doing this size swapping thing as it is happening so fast but the part of me that enjoys dressing her up is excited as the clothing possibilities open.

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Snuggly Mama

My Lil'Miss has taken to sleeping on Mama. Daytime naps, nighttime sleeping it doesn't matter as long as she's on the mama. While I love the cuddles and kissing her sweet head, I kinda wish I could put her down successfully at least occassionally. Like now for instance. I was raring to go scrub the office floor of cat litter and pee since the cats have found a new way to show thier jealousy by peeing on her activity mat I keep in there. But alas, I must sit on the couch all warm and snuggly.

While being a snuggly Mama is rewarding, it's also sweaty, tiring work. Hot baby=sweaty. And tiring because, well warning to anyone who hasn't cared for a newborn, they don't get the memo that "sleeping like a baby" means calm, still, quiet, deep sleep. At least not this baby, so I don't really get
much sleep myself. And crazily I'm not napping right now while everyone else is in this house is on this bright Sunday afternoon.
I'm just not sleepy but I'm sure i will be right as everyone is waking up. It's how it usually goes.

I know this is just a phase and I'll want to be able to return to this time down the road when her head looses that sweet baby smell or when she won't let me kiss her all over anymore so I'm not meaning to complain. Just sometimes a little time sans baby might be nice.

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Random thoughts which come up while trapped by a baby nap

How does one untangle from a sleeping baby without waking them up?

Why must farting wake up the baby? Her's not mine.

Why will she only sleep well when on or cuddled into me? Not totally complaining at this point in time because she's cute and cuddly but I foresee this might be a problem in the future... Like in 5 minutes when I just can't hold it anymore.

Man I'm glad I could reach my phone with my toes! Too bad my glass of water is out of reach...or maybe that's a good thing.

So much for running errands today. Dinner of frozen or canned food products might be ok. At least there are organic Strawberries from the farmers market trip yesterday. Or maybe I can whip up a cheese and salami sandwich. See, totally don't HAVE to go to the store.

Crap, there keeps being things I need to add to my Costco and Grocery lists but I never remember when I have a moment to jot them down.

Last weeks shots totally threw off our night=deep sleep routine. She was just too fussy. And then the 2 nights of fireworks killed 2 more nights. And today's long nap isn't going to help. At least I got in a few hours of a nap too which will dramatically help me cope with the current sleeping issues.

No kitty. Don't step on the baby. How do I explain to you why it's ok to step on me but not her?

I think she has eczema on her ear. The skin flakes off.

Ok. Five minutes up. Sorry baby. Mama's don't wear diapers.

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My new morning

I got up this morning to find Scout Ants in the kitchen. Of course I shall choose to blame the fact that no one did the dishes yesterday, but I'm sure that's just a coincidence. So I spent my precious baby free morning hour cleaning and scrubbing the kitchen (Eric usually cuddles/naps with the baby on mornings he doesn't work until she decides eating again would be more fun)
After the ants appeared gone I then scrubbed the floor, then the garbage can and then sure why not the stove/oven too.
Of course my wrists are killing me all the while but my need for clean was too great.

Now I have again nursed the baby and am pumping my foot on the baby bouncy seat to get this little one to sleep long enough for me to eat some breakfast hopefully before lunch time. I made oatmeal on my clean stove about 2 hours ago. Mmmm

Wish me luck on the eating. It's my toughest daily challenge (oh and Eric has totally already showered and is back taking ANOTHER nap and it's not even 11am yet as I sit hear in my bathrobe ...sheesh)


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